Button Flies

If you haven't come across button flies in your lifetime, consider yourself lucky. Unfortunately for me, apparently Europeans love them, and I had the misfortune of having to have to buy a pair of jeans in the Netherlands. And every, single, freaking pair has them. Not familiar? they look like this:

Wondering why you pants are just as fucking annoying to put on as
your button shirt? Blame Europeans

My dutch friend recently tried to convince me that button flies are, in fact superior. He said, after a while, you get so used to them that you can just undo them as quickly as a zipper, and that buttoning them up is also just as fast. My response: full of shit. How can it be physically easier and faster to perform 3 actions in the time it should take to do one? Shit, I have enough trouble buttoning the single button on my pants after zipping up, don't give me another 3.

The ONLY advantage I can think of for button flies is that there is no chance of getting your junk caught in the fly. But honestly, if that ever happens to you, you should probably rethink your genetics, and allow yourself to get castrated by the zipper.

Knowing my luck, it's probably going to fucking happen to me tomorrow.